


Goodbye Is The Hardest Word

by smokingwolf



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/M, Short One Shot, Unplanned Pregnancy, very short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-10
Updated: 2014-12-10
Packaged: 2018-02-28 21:52:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2748392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smokingwolf/pseuds/smokingwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Relationships are hard, what's harder is saying goodbye to a love neither can live without.</p><p>or the one where they don't keep the baby.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye Is The Hardest Word

_You're not raising that baby, you hear me? You're going to finish school, go to college and become a doctor like you always wanted. I will not let him bring you down. You aren't keeping that child, Clarke!_

The words echoed in her head as she sobbed in bed, her knees curled up to chest. Tears streamed down, fear and worry plagued at her heart.

Motherhood had always scared her, not that she thought about that much, but it’s been a week since she found out. And she knew one thing: she wasn't ready to be a mother. She was torn between keeping the child or adoption, even though her mother had strictly forbidden the option of keeping it, she still wondered.

She wondered if it would be a girl or a boy, if it would have his eyes or hers. (She hoped it had his) Would it have her golden locks or his dark curls and his freckles, she wished she could know. Wished she could watch the child grow and spot the moments that the child was like her or him. The thoughts caused more tears to run down her pale skin. Her head began to pound, hurt from the tears.

She lifted her head the moment she heard the soft knock.

It was **him** _._

She stood from her bed, crossed the room and came face to face with the father of her child, the boy she loved. His eyes were puffy, his nose had a slight red tint, his hair was a mess and his eyes held so much sadness.

She opened the window. He climbed in and pulled her into a tight embrace. The words _I_ _love you_ repeatedly trembled out of him. The sound of his voice, his sadness brought her to her knees, sobbing into his chest.

An hour passed, the tears subsided, but the pain and anger she felt lingered. She rested her head on his chest as he played with her golden curls, twisting strands in his fingers and occasionally pressed small kisses to her head.

"Clarke" He whispered, softly.

"We can't keep it" Clarke blurted out; the courage that mustered in her finally tumbled out. She felt him exhale a deep breath. His own sobs cracked his strong exterior. "We _can’t_ " she cried as she removed herself from him, facing him. One thought came to her; she’d never seen him so _broken_.

"I love you! Okay. I love you and we can do this, baby please. It's our child, half you, half me" he cupped her face. The warmth of his hands relaxed her. He kissed her lips, her cheeks, and her jaw.

"Bellamy" She cried, gently pushing him away.

"No, Clarke. I know–- I know we didn't plan this, and it's going to be hard but we _can_ do this" Her tears catched speed at his words and her mother’s voice began to echo in her ears.

_You are not keeping that baby, Clarke!_

"We can't!" She turned away at the fear of the emotion he'd express next.

Bellamy cleared his throat. "Is this your mom talking or you?" bitterness laced every word.

Her mother’s voice began to echo again, this time louder, this time stronger.

_Convince him it’s what you want. It’s what's best for the both of you and you know it_

"Clarke, answer me" Clarke heard him say, softly.

"It’s what’s best for the both of us, Bell" Clarke still refused to face him, her blue eyes landed on the picture that stood at her desk. A picture of her and Bellamy, she’s smiling and his eyes are closed, his lips on her cheek. They were so happy once upon a time.

"I'm sorry" Clarke spoke after an hour of silence.

"Yeah, I'm sorry too"

*****

His back found support against the wall opposite of the delivery room. His dark eyes focused on the wooden door, he rushed to the hospital as soon as Clarke had called.

The last nine months were hell for him. His romantic relationship with Clarke ended, his friendship remained. They had agreed on adoption. He accompanied her to the doctor’s appointments and went home with her after school everyday to watch her grow, to experience the pregnancy with her.

His heart still belonged to her, to Clarke Griffin and the beauty his eyes laid on still belonged to her. He loved her with every bone in his body and his anger toward her (strangely enough) hadn't changed that.

He waited twenty minutes for Abigail Griffin to exit the room. He couldn’t stand to be in the same room as her. The door swung open, Abigail walked out tears stained on her face. "She's ready to see you"

He watched Abby walk away, his eyes then fell to the wooden door in front of him, the number 319 attached to the side. He approached the door, slowly, his hand gripped the door knob, his hand turned pale. He took a deep breath and twisted.

Her eyes were already planted on him, blue eyes searched his face and a small smile grazed her face. "Hey" She said, shyly.

"Hey" Bellamy sat beside her and grabbed a hold of her hand, squeezing gently as he returned the smile. They talked for hours, a few laughs here and there.

On October 5, 2014 at 1:45pm, a baby girl with tan skin and light hair came into the world, screaming and crying like an angel, so Bellamy thought.

Clarke refused to hold the baby, her gaze darted to the window. Bellamy took the infant from the nurse’s arms. The small child was wrapped in a pink blanket, her eyes shut closed while she made soft whiny sounds. He stared at her sleeping form, tears covered his smile

"Hey, baby girl, I'm your dad. I love you so much already. I loved you before I even met you, can you believe that? I just want to say I’m sorry I won’t get to know you, but I hope one day I get to. You will always be my world." He pressed a light feather kiss to the baby's forehead. His smile increased with joy.

His attention shifted to Clarke, she stared out the window tears completely wet her face. "Are you sure you don't want to say goodbye?"

Clarke took a minute before she extended her arms out to hold the baby. "Stay" She whispered and he did.

"Hi, it’s mom. I love you with all my heart and I wish that I didn’t have to let you go but I need you to know that you are loved and wanted and needed. I’m so sorry, I love you. Goodbye" She sobbed as she stared at the incredibly beautiful tiny human she helped create.

Bellamy stared at her with pained eyes. His heart broke into a million pieces. The pain that covered Clarke’s face broke his heart. He _never_ wanted to see her so broken and so lost.

"Bellamy, I'm sorry" He heard her say. He sat beside her on the bed, an arm around her, kissing her temple.

"You have nothing to be sorry for"

A knock rang throughout the quiet room and a moment later Abby’s there ready to take the baby away to her new home. "It's time, Clarke"

Bellamy and Clarke gave their last kisses to the baby before handing her to Abby.

As soon as Abby disappeared, they broke into uncontrollable sobs, both reached for each other. Bellamy held her tight against his chest and she sobbed into his shirt. "Stay" she said, and they both knew she meant it in so many ways.

"Always"

**Author's Note:**

> So how was it? Any good? I really want to know. I hope you enjoyed the story and leave a kudo or a comment. Thanks for taking the time to read! (:


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